Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
