i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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