yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
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I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
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It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
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