I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
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I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
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he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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