His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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