so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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