i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
