I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
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