"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Randomize
