I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Gay?
German.
Pity.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize