i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
