yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
