Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
