I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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