Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
we made out on top of his cat.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
