he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
