Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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