shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
