i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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