I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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