Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
