i robbed the continental breakfast last night
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
well, you know. whores of a feather.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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