People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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