I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
