we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I think your dad took our porno
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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