You can't motorboat a personality
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
no. you can't hotbox the world.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Drunk is not a location!
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
