and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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