drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
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