Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
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