i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
