I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
