This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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