you guys were way drunker than both of me
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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