And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
