Define "chronic" masturbator.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I want to fling myself into the sun
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize