Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
