i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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