my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize