she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
