is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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