i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Randomize
