How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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