When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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