Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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