apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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