I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Congratulations! We have a period
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