i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
whose ass print is on the piano?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize