How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
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I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
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i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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