And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
