Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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