We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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